i miss you

today's title comes from blink-182 and my state of mind. more the latter than the former, but i wanted an excuse to post the song:

so i'm sitting in my basement, relishing the return of fox soccer channel to my life and waiting for today's yesterday's real madrid champion's league match replay to come on since the game was hilarious and i want to rewatch it. it doesn't come on for another hour and is scheduled to end at five, so it's going to be a long night. it's a good thing that college has pretty much cemented my nocturnal state.

you all probably know this, thanks to the wonders of facebook (or, you know, you were there with me), but i went to see harry potter again with jenibean and s-la. it was great. this might change with the final movie, but right now deathly hallows part one is my favorite of all the films - it stayed mostly true to the books, and the few changes are actually for the better. the score was kind of an iffy thing with me. i've loved the music in all of the films, and i stayed with that opinion for most of this one, too. there were a few places where i thought it went a little wrong (the trio's reunion scene and dobby's funeral both come to mind), but when it went right - wow. the ending could not have been better (musically, anyway - it still made me want part two, like, now).

surprisingly, harry potter is not the focus of this post. the title is.

it's funny (or horrible, depending on who you are and how you look at it), but i don't miss most of you/my high school friends very often. when i do miss people, it's usually someone i wasn't that close to. if anything, i miss inanimate objects more than i miss people. my bed and i? yeah, we've never been closer because i'm sleeping my life away and am insanely grateful to come home to a pillow-topped queen size bed which i can flop face down on and sleep for hours, maybe days. maybe it's because i'm so used to being separated from the munchkins - i haven't gone to school with bean in three years, and i've had a grand total of two classes with s-la ever - but when i do think of them, i usually just text or call or facebook or oovoo and move on with my day. so it came as kind of a surprise to realize today that i've actually really missed them. for one thing, it's good to be around someone who hates pants even more than i do. also, it was nice to realize that s-la and i are still fairly good at either saying the same thing or the same time or finishing each other's sentences (and, really, it was just good to be with someone who shares my appreciation of silly grocery store romance novels). i guess it's just good to know that some things don't change.

and now i'm going to go reread harry potter and the deathly hallows. why isn't part two out now?

a matter of time

today's title comes from walk in the park by beach house.

it's that time of year again. nanoblogmo time! is anyone else doing it this year? you better be.

anyway, to kick this year's nanoblogmo off, i have exciting news. well, exciting news for some of us, anyway. s-la, jenibean, meggo - take note. we have the world's best gingerbread house theme for this year. joanna the hall-e helped me come up with it. it was kind of an accident, but then i thought - hey, this could work. check your mail for the blueprint soon, meggo.

random, but this has been floating around facebook and i thought it was cool. however, there is the better football soccer news, too:

like this. that's right - schweini is considering a move to the premier league next season. and, you know, liverpool has new owners and new money to spend...please, oh please, let this happen. and speaking of liverpool, this happened. i miss rafa. and i really hope that idiot manager leaves soon.

anyway, today's post is going to be short. i've been doing too much writing lately. first there was the five page paper i did in two hours (but spent, like, a week outlining), and then all of the letters to reply to. isn't the wall of mail terrifying wonderful? it's actually grown since then because the other circle k officers sent me "welcome to the club" cards, but i haven't put them up yet.

despite the fact that i'm running out of room, keep up the good work, guys, since i'm getting, like, next to nothing from the parental units. well, husband number two sends care packages and husband number three signed me up for all those magazine subscriptions, but the momster...hmmph. i texted her yet another picture of my sad and empty mailbox today as a gentle hint and she called me back and sounded really depressed and promised me packages, maybe even a package full of candy. and i totally believed her. until she burst into laughter and said, it'd probably be more like an envelope. with a single m&m in it. what the hell, mother? i was so excited. but according to her, i'm supposed to settle for seeing her in person. apparently she finds my love of snail mail extremely "silly". i had to pull out my hmmphiest hmmph-face yet, and it had no effect. i'm still annoyed. 

and now i'm going to the gym with joanna the hall-e. wish me luck/calorie burning! 

it was hot and it was summer

today's title comes from better than revenge by taylor swift. underwhelmed as i was by her last album, i'm pretty in love with this one. it's pretty amazing - and she's actually doing all her own writing. i'd post it, but it isn't on youtube yet, so listen to this instead:

i forgot to mention this album in yesterday's music post, which is strange since it's all i've been listening to at night:

it's wonderful. like rock n' roll and radio and new york city's killing me are my favorites right now, but the whole thing is great. it's a little softer than gossip in the grain, but still good.

we read this in class today, and i really liked it. also, it's been a while since i posted any poetry:

Coming by evening through the wintry city

We said that art is out of love with life.

Here we approach a love that is not pity.

This antique discipline, tenderly severe,

Renews belief in love yet masters feeling,

Asking of us a grace in what we bear.

Form is the ultimate gift that love can offer -

The vital union of necessity

With all that we desire, all that we suffer.

A too-compassionate art is half an art.

Only such proud restraining purity

Restores the else-betrayed, too-human heart.

- Adrienne Rich 

i was too depressed to blog about it at the time, but on sunday i got one of the hall-es to give my bangs an emergency trim (since they were approaching IT LOOKS LIKE YOU DON'T HAVE EYES levels of growth) and michelle (the usual trimmer) was at home. sadly, the trim turned into a massacre. my poor hair has been maimed. it's a good two inches shorter than it's supposed to be. i've been assured that it'll grow back in two weeks or so, but until then...well, i wore a hat in 78 degree weather today. and i asked the momster to drop of all my scarves and her trench coat, so i've been swanning around wearing headscarves and sunglasses and her trench coat and doing my best imitation of a fifties film star, as outlined in the plan i proposed to s-la, meggo, and jeni on oovoo sunday night.

we're doing laundry now. or, we're waiting for our laundry to finish drying so we can get to the horrible task of folding it. one of the dryers broke, like, ten minutes into us using it - which is ridiculous since they're brand new bought-in-august-you-must-buy-the-super-expensive-high-efficiency-detergent-or-else machines. but while we were loading up the other dryers with our clothes we heard a bang and then a series of thumping noises coming from it. upon investigation, one of the curvy plastic things inside it broke off and was rattling around with our clothes, so we moved them into another dryer. i pulled the liverpool jersey out, though. i decided it was an omen against drying it. fernando torres in jersey form is now drying on a hanger in front of joanna's fan.

never mind, our clothes are apparently done. au revoir.

just another weird day

today was interesting. it started off with youtubing and brunch in the morning with my roomies and some hall-es. then the momster, who had a real estate errand to run in richmond, showed up so i could go with her since i didn't have class in the afternoon. the drive down was fun. it's strange - she did something cray cray again and then made me even angrier by trying to buy my approval, but i still miss her. go figure. we had a mother-daughter spa day in richmond - manicures, pedicures, and my first ever grown up facial. my face feels funny. oh, and i have no calluses, so running with sarah and lauren tomorrow is going to be oh-so-very fun. we stopped by panera to say hi/have lunch with jenibean and meggo since i wanted to see what their campus looked like/be able to visit them on my own. i'm thinking that probably won't ever happen again. we got lost three times even with gps, and the third time was in a really sketchy area. other than that, it was nice seeing them again, even if it took me like five minutes to recognize jenibean when she was standing right in front of me.

after that we had to speed back to campus since i had my anthropology club meeting (the topic was memes!), photography club meeting, anime club meeting (that's right - i joined it. one of the hall-es forced us all to sign up so she wouldn't be alone, but the anime we watched was actually interesting and about kidnappings and the mafia, so i don't think i mind it much), and dinner plans with the hall-es/random other friends to get to. oh, and then we went to the outdoor movie night in ball circle to watch the sandlot, but i cut out early because the cray crays wanted me to get on oovoo. bad idea, i must say. this is like the third time i've blown off plans with my new friends to say hi to the old ones, and it's starting to get annoying. like, i'm making an effort and all, but i guess it's not really a big deal if we don't talk every day/week/month etc. i mean, there's still breaks. besides, i'm having a horrible week parentally - money aside - and putting up with half an hour of "you're frozen" when i could be making/hanging out with new friends is...yeah, unappealing. actually, it kind of sucked. so i was emo for about five minutes and then me and the hall-es grabbed ice cream/stuck our heads in the freezer because it's just that hot out and started youtubing. somehow we ended up watching gabriel iglesias videos (tangent: michelle was convinced he was called julio iglesias and kept trying to youtube him instead) until...now, actually. we're about halfway through the playlist. i'd post one, but embedding from the phone is hard. if you haven't (and you probably have - everyone has) go watch his stuff.

p.s. i'm trying to blog more often. maybe i'll pick nanoblogmo up again this year.

we all knew this was coming

it's two thirty in the morning and i'm still awake. i am one hundred percent packed now. even the car is packed up. that's how packed for college i am. also, i really hate using my number keypad, so don't expect anything with...digits. is that the word? i don't actually know. it's late, i'm tired, and...

i don't remember my first day of high school. or middle school, for that matter. for some reason i do remember every first day of every grade between kindergarten and sixth grade. i guess my brain is just weird like that.

well, today is about to be my first day of college. i wonder if i'll remember this one. i guess that's why i'm blogging. i really shouldn't be, i'm so tired that i can't even understand what i'm typing right now. i guess it's a free write, then. stream-of-consciousness? if only i was james joyce.

i'm actually excited to go to college - and even if i wasn't, the momster's crying fits in the container store/bed, bath & beyond/harris teeter/every public place in the world would be enough to make me excited just at the prospect of leaving her. but...

my room is empty. like, meggo's and jenibean's fans are off the walls and my bulletin board is taken down and my sheets are in the dryer still because the momster said i wouldn't want to come home to a dirty room. it's so creepy.

so now i'm sleeping on the couch. it's kind of fitting in a way. i mean, my first night in this house (my first night in a lot of houses, actually) was spent sleeping on the couch because those slacker parents of mine were too lazy to set up my bedframe. they blamed it on my picking out a bed made of wrought iron and wood. i still think they were just lazy.

i dyed my hair black yesterday. it's going to be a pain to keep up during college, but at least it isn't The Oops.

just looking at the link is enough to make me nostalgic. alas, alack. woe is me, etc. etc.

in other news, real madrid signed another midfielder and drew against a third-rate belgian team in a pointless friendly yesterday. if they keep this crap up expect lots and lots of pissed off soccer ranting from me this year.

oh, and get on oovoo. it's addictive.

let's see how far we've come

today's title comes from how far we've come by matchbox twenty. i've got this playlist full of really cheesy songs that i listen to during moves/transferring schools/important life changes &c. and this one is all over it.

in case that wasn't enough to tip you off, i'm in full on nostalgia mode right now. i'm not entirely sure why it kicked in now and not, like, a week/month/year ago, but...well, it probably has something to do with this:

that? that is the result of six hours of shopping yesterday. my feet still haven't recovered. and i strained my ankle doing yoga last night and have to wear tape on it like a loser, so that might have something to do with it.


i've got to pick up a bunch of odds and ends tomorrow morning before the movie marathon s-la mentioned finally starts, but other than that i'm...done. other than laundry and physically throwing things into boxes (i'm not a big believer in that thing called "neatness", especially not when it comes to packing), i'm actually ready to move into my dorm...and away from home. i feel like i should be more excited/worried/spastic about this. i'm mostly just calm, though. maybe this is the real reason seniors get to leave school early - summer has stretched on for so long that i'm just ready to actually do something. or at least get away from the momster who keeps trying to bribe me to stay home with cupcakes and coffee and crying binges in the middle of the container store, oh lord.

it's so weird to think about this, but - excepting meggo, of course - i didn't know any of you four years ago, and now you're all so important. i wonder who we're all going to meet in the next four years. i wonder if we'll still talk then, or if we'll all have gone the way of the girl jenibean affectionately refers to as she-devil. like s-la, i don't think we will. for one thing, we really are the only people weird enough to put up with each other, and for another, i'm kind of bossy. all of you better expect lots of annoying blog posts/texts/facebook messages from me for the rest of your lives. also, we've discovered technology! see?

look at us, using technology. successfully, even. i'm still a little amazed. honestly, web cams just make me feel old. it seems like not that long ago video chatting was that thing they showed in movies to let you know you were in The Future. what happened to us?

also, i feel like our omegle adventures really have scarred me for life. like, i might have post traumatic stress disorders. when we added bean to the conversation her friend was the only person in view and i had, like, a vietnam flashback, all "OMG PENISES. PENISES ARE GOING TO RISE OUT OF THE DEPTHS AND FLASH US RUN FOR YOUR LIVES BITCHES."

and, yes, that is exactly how the vietnam war was fought. don't let anyone tell you anything different, okay?

maybe later i'll take a picture of the dogs for you all. the momster had them shaved again. they look terrifying.

shine when the sunset shifts

today's title is, once again, from tv on the radio's wolf like me. if you haven't listened to it yet (or heard it before - like i said before: it's old) scroll down and hit play. i'm four winds in love with it right now.

so gina tagged me in the little ha, little, i love you, gina, the way to my heart and bloggy affections is through shiny things and flattery award above (and i, being highly susceptible to flattery, am all sorts of pleased) so i'm going to go ahead and use this as an excuse to talk about my shopping adventures.

i headed out after the interviews (which seemed to go well, except for the part where the manager at guess asked my age at the end and then told me that she would hire me but would have to wait til i'm 18...when i'll be at college. which sucks. but if i need a job next summer i guess i know where to go) to do some graduation present shopping for myself. i picked up a few things for other people, don't worry, but the real highlights of my trip were these:

i got a few other things, too, like a black romper and a green shirt (for ten dollars! ten! at banana republic!) but they're in the washer so i can wear them this week. oh, and then i went to tyson's with the momster. be proud, everyone. i went to free people and bought something for another person who better be damn grateful or i will cut her.

now that i've shared my materialistic joy with everyone, time to follow the rules of the award:

so, five random facts about rachel:

1. all of my electronics have names. my first laptop was named dorothy parker, dot for short. this one is named compy. my ipod is ophelia and my phone is eve. i'm not sure why i always name things, but i think it has something to do with being an only child.
2. when in doubt, i blame my parents for everything. see fact #1. 
3. i worry all the time and about the most random things. i guess i think too much. like, it's impossible for me to get to sleep until i'm dead tired because my brain just won't shut off. 
4. i reread all my favorite children's book series at least once a year. it's all the basics: anne of green gables, betsy-tacy, harry potter, narnia, lord of the rings, and madeleine l'engle's books. 
5. i've had this bracelet since i was a baby. back then it was so big i could wear it around my neck as a necklace. the momster told me that i would grow into it but i still have to fasten it between the zebra and the elephant:

looking at that list, it's very obvious that i'm a pretty boring person. oh well. maybe in my next life i'll be Dramatic and Mysterious. of course, if reincarnation is real i'll probably end up as a cockroach in my next life for all the horrible things i've done (or plan to do, let's be realistic here) but cockroaches can be Dramatic and Mysterious, too. 

now i get to tag 5 bloggers for the award. oh boy! 

1. dulce candy and euchante tv. hell, i'll throw in the stylish wanderer, too, even though everyone already follows her. they're all actual fashion bloggers, so i don't think they need too much explanation. 
2. high kicks and high hopes. this is the blog of one of the radio city rockettes who i found - shameful as this is to admit - during the Dark Days of Yore when i was obsessed with panic! at the disco and the guitarist she was dating. since then she and said guitarist broke up...and then the guitarist broke up with his band...and my stalking activities are sadly curtailed. i still follow her for her interesting posts. it's not a fashion-centric blog but some of her posts are and her style is great.
3. the sassy curmudgeon. i found this blog via jenibean. it's great - she's snarky, looks up to carrie bradshaw as we all should and has great clothes.  
4. last and very definitely least since she is the worst blogger in the world and never updates is The Bean herself. jenibean has fun (albeit overwhelmingly black) clothes, but she's been branching out since the Dark Days of A Little Bit After Yore But Not Yet The Present and buying things with actual colors and patterns. sometimes she even cleans her closet. 

by the way, i finished reading john adams. it was really good. i still have half of that writing post i mentioned a few days ago saved in my drafts, so maybe i'll tack on a review and put it up later. i'm probably going to save it for another day, though. it has actual thinky thoughts in it and i want to do them justice. 

here's what i've been listening to a lot today:

with no shadows on your doubts

today's title comes from devil in the details by the ambience affair. it's amazing. i got it off of this month's indie/rock playlist and am completely in love with it. so, naturally i went a-looking for the rest of their songs and found them to be equally amazing. also, their lead singer personally answered a lyrical question on yahoo answers, which i find pretty endearing. anyway, i'll just post the song so you can become obsessed with them, too.

and, yes, part of the reason i'm posting the music video is because i think it's incredibly cool that they didn't use a video camera to make it. whatever - i'm easily amused, okay?

since s-la has already blogged about it, i'm not going to bother recapping our fun-filled, backyard hair-dyeing adventures with jenibean and meggo. instead, i'll talk about glee.

i know what you're thinking: "not this again." but hear me out - tonight was the lady gaga episode. gaga. and it made fun of twilight. repeatedly. all while promoting a message of tolerance, family togetherness, and the importance of hot outfits. what's not to love? i can't wait until next week's episode. the previews made it look insane.

speaking of things that are insane, the momster has been gone for the last few days. she's in las vegas at a business conference, leaving me all alone for days. five of them, to be specific, since she comes back late tomorrow night and left on sunday. i'm still bitter that i didn't get to go with her, but leaving school for a week when we only have, like, two weeks of classes left seemed like a bad idea.

now, we all know that i'm not the most...practical of people. i'm not all that great with the whole self-sufficiency thing. never fear, though - i made myself checklists of things i need to do so i don't die or get kidnapped or starve or something. also, the momster and several of our nosy neighbors have been calling constantly. as you can imagine, that got annoying pretty quickly, so i've stopped answering the phone. they'll get over it.

i've been loving having the house to myself. it's been nice having everything so quiet. i think it's a sign of how nerdy/lame i am that the craziest thing i've done in my four days of alone-time is reenact the risky business pants off dance off around my house. for those of you who don't know what i'm talking about, here's the clip:

okay, so i lied. i couldn't help it. risky business had tom cruise in it, and there's no way i'm putting him and his crazy scientologist face up on my blog. it's not even a real word, let alone a religion; safari keeps putting a little red line under scientologist. besides, i love scrubs.

oh, and in musical news, christina aguilera's album leaked. i might be jumping the gun a little here, but based on my first few listens, it's pretty awful. at its best, it's a lady gaga rip off. at its worst it turns into a watered down version of britney spears' worst songs. no wonder she cancelled her tour. how did she spend four years working on this? back to basics was so good. even her greatest hits album had amazing remixes on it. it's like she regressed...into jessica simpson.

and in linky news, if espn covered sports like this i might actually watch it. or at least know what channel number espn is.

other than that, my week has been pretty boring. mostly all i've been doing is playing card games and apples to apples in class, wandering around the school getting up to shenanigans that i'll tell you about after graduation (if i remember, which is doubtful), and actually learning new things in physics. like i said: boring.

and now i'm going to do more boring things: feeding, watering, and walking my dogs. they're like plants but cuter.

one night to be confused

today's title comes from heartbeats by the knife, as covered by jose gonzalez. it's pretty.

i've had a fairly busy two days. yesterday, as i might have mentioned (i don't know if i did or not, and i'm too lazy to go back and check), i did yoga for the first time since AP exams began. it was great at the time, but i've been feeling the effects all day. here's a helpful warning for all of you: lunges, squats, running, and leg- and thigh-targeting yoga tapes do not make for a very comfortable monday morning. i was so sore today and most of the soreness was centered in my legs so i spent the whole day convinced that i was walking strangely. paranoia: it's the new black.

this whole day was pretty weird, actually.

you totally thought this would be a gif. to which i say: suck it, predictability.

yeah, that picture basically sums up all my feelings regarding school, life, and the world in general.

my day kicked off at the wonderful hour of 2 a.m. because i had a killer migraine. still retaining hopes of getting a decent amount of sleep, i went downstairs and hit up the advil bottle, figuring that would get rid of all my headache-related troubles. and then i went back to bed and waited for my migraine to go away...for two hours. at 4:30 i finally gave up and went downstairs and took three of the closest aspirin-looking bottle i could find (i wasn't wearing my glasses), figuring that the pills looked like tylenol. and they were - tylenol p.m. needless to say i finally got back to sleep...and woke up at 8 a.m. to find the momster banging on my door. i took one of the fastest showers of my life, threw on an outfit comprised entirely of clothes i haven't worn since eighth grade or freshman year, and went to school.

i probably would have fallen right back asleep in the car if it weren't for an emergency trip to starbucks. i lucked out there. they were training a new employee and it was still raining so there was no line, and the new employee messed up my drink order the first time she tried to make it so i got a free venti sized drink instead. i also had two backup tumblers of coffee to tide me over until lunch. luckily school wasn't so bad. my a day teachers, at least, have had the decency to give up on the possibility of any of us learning anything within the lovely cinderblock walls of a high school ever again. so we're doing a completely useless project in econ (jennifer and i are already almost done), sitting around and chatting in yearbook, and watching movies and drawing pictures about our Feelings in gov (you don't know how much i wished i was british during that class so i could sit up and announce, "i'm english - we don't have feelings" and maybe thrown in a "pip pip" or a "cheerio" or something similar. i don't know, in my mind people in england are still stuck in the empire builder stage).

robert downey jr. has no purpose in this post. robert downey jr. needs no purpose.

and then came early release, where i chatted with mona while i waited for the momster to come collect me (no, i will not be driving regularly enough to take myself to school, thank you very much. i'm not that crazy). we had a good talk, involving makeup, music, and blogging. apparently she's a lurker. also, she might be joining our Nameless Band of Munchkins Except For Jenibean Who Throws the Entire Thing Off By Being a Tall Asian So I Guess We're Musketeers for our sleepover this friday. since we don't want a repeat of how s-la was introduced to the other Musketeers (it was awkward), i suggest she start commenting so that the Musketeers can get to know her. also, everyone keep in mind that our merry band of almost-munchkins is welcome to suggestions for a better name.

then came the two hour conference call of slightly dead-eyed randomness (methinks i wasn't the only one feeling a little out of it today) where we attempted to hash out our weekend plans. conclusions reached: we can't make plans. it was enlightening. at least i rediscovered a kesha song and found my 997th cover song. now to find those last three. i'm hoping they're good ones. quality control is important, you know?

and then i started blogging. oh, and catching up on my usual internet binge of current events/music news/blog reading. here's a new one i found. it's equal parts funny and sad, so be warned.

and here are the songs i've been listening to today. none of them are new or unique or anything. they've just been on loop in my head.

today's title song:

another pretty song. i first heard it on grey's anatomy years (has it really been years since that show was decent enough to watch? that's so weird) ago in the second season episode damage case. if you haven't watched the first two seasons of that show, you should, since they were actually really good...and then it got famous and the writing became awful:

oh, and this one's been on my summer sleep playlist for a while, but i thought now would be a good time to post it since i have a banana-related message anyway and i'm too lazy to get on facebook (which i hate). dear banana: s-la wants you to come on a b day like tuesday or thursday or next monday or wednesday. then you can join the early release movie club and visit the weeds in the senior courtyard with us. i half agree with this plan, but would also like to point out that i am both incapable of giving advice and am in actual classes for three fourths of every b day, whereas you could probably sneak into econ (i have williams) and yearbook on a days. but then you could visit sturtz on b days when i have her and...i have no idea. i'm highly indecisive. show up some day so we can marvel over how much you once grew and how worldly wise you are &c. &c.

been there, done that, messed around

today's title comes from la roux's bulletproof. it was playing in forever 21 today and got stuck in my head. again. oh well. at least it's cheerful.

in case i hadn't made it clear, i went shopping today. in comparison to the momster's haul, i didn't get too much. you should all be proud. see?

clockwise from left to right: the widow of the south, an at-home parafin spa kit, urban decay's essential shadow box, eye shadow primer potion, and the best bra of all time

audrey hepburn t-shirt dress and floral lace leggings, both from forever 21

technically the at-home parafin spa kit was one of the momster's purchases but i'm counting in my books too. mostly because i'm going to be the first one using it as soon as this blog is over.

oh, and the bra isn't just me being slightly inappropriate (come on, do i blog every time i go bra shopping? i think not. well, except for that one time with the rainbow bra, but that was an exception because...rainbows). nope. this time there's a story behind it.

you know how victoria's secret has all those mannequins scattered throughout the store? and they always wear the cutest things? well, at the fair oaks victoria's secret the first mannequin you see in the store was wearing the same bra pictured above. isn't it cute? i think so. unfortunately it was sold out in my size, so i had the momster distract the saleswoman while i...well, technically i stripped the poor, unfortunate mannequin, but it was all for a good cause giving the store money and therefore stimulating the economy and doing my little bit to get us out of this recession before i have to get a job so just...

no, really. i know it sounds bad, but at least i paid for it, okay? and so what if i didn't find another bra to put on the mannequin? that would've looked even worse. i was lucky enough that no one saw me taking the bra in the first place - trying to put one on it would've looked a bunch worse. i could've been arrested. the mall cops would've been all, "why were you doing inappropriate things to a mannequin in public?" and i would've had to be like, "i wasn't! really! see:

no, really, how is he not gay?

and it would've been awkward for everyone. oh, and i was already an hour late for jenibean's birthday party (she turned old legal eighteen today so everybody head over to her blog and say happy birthday, okay?), which then turned into two hours between the momster's pressing need for cheesecake factory and the horrible traffic in fairfax/chantilly.

anyway, while i was shopping today, i came to a surprising conclusion. it's probably going to get me a 2 on my ap econ exam, actually, but:

the average american consumer is a moron.

seriously. 

this one's $12.00. 

harsh words, but while in forever 21 today - a store i usually consider more sensible than urban outfitters or free people, much as i love them both - i discovered that people will willingly spend over twenty dollars on 37 holes and leftover bits of t-shirt. not even a shirt. a shirt-fetus. in nine months these might one day have emerged as fully grown t-shirt members of society, but those darn chinese factory workers got to them and aborted their little fabric-y souls before they ever had a chance.

since i just got home from jenibean's birthday party (where, s-la, meggo, and emmeline-with-no-code-name-because-she-doesn't-blog-but-don't-get-any-ideas-gina-this-can't-be-your-label-because-you-blog-and-also-it's-too-long-and-has-too-many-hyphens-oh-my-god and i decorated her room in a manner which i, personally and redundantly, think deserves a blog post. a gentle hint, bean), i'm going to finish this post up with two things. never mind, i lied and am too lazy to hit the backspace button. it's going to be three things.

thing the first: dear lurkers - and i know you exist, sitting at your keyboards and being all lurker-y - did you know that you can comment anonymously? really, you can. just hit the little comment button at the top of the post and say something so i know i'm not hallucinating you. thanks.

thing the second. more la roux:

thing the third. the very best birthday song:

the place where your soul had died

today's title? bixby canyon bridge by death cab for cutie. yes, that death cab for cutie. wait? that's just a picture of ben gibbard and zooey deschanel? oh well. they're both ah-dorable and ah-mazing and incredibly talented. oh, and we love their music. mona would like you all to know that she is amazingly cool. in case the mona-mention hadn't tipped you off, i'm writing this post from the library.

i know, i know. marvel at my dedication. or don't, since i didn't blog at all over the weekend. here, i'll make it up to you:

Stars wheel in purple, yours is not so rare
as Hesperus, nor yet so great a star
as bright Aldeboran or Sirius,
nor yet the stained and brilliant one of War;

stars turn in purple, glorious to the sight;
yours is not gracious as the Pleiads are
nor as Orion's sapphires, luminous;

yet disenchanted, cold, imperious face,
when all the others blighted, reel and fall,
your star, steel-set, keeps lone and frigid tryst
to freighted ships, baffled in wind and blast.

isn't that a pretty poem? it's by h. d., aka hilda doolittle. she was pretty awesome. i'd go on a bit more about poetry, but mona's currently describing the homemade sponge cake she's bringing to school tomorrow, so i'm mostly just salivating over that. i'm serious - hearing her descriptions of dessert has reduced me to a drooling, gibbering wreck of a person who has no other purpose in life beyond the googling of chocolate-filled images. see? proof:

...hypothetically speaking, the prospect of future desserts might intensify my natural tendency to hyperbolize. might.

true story: i just tried to type "might" as "mgmt". freudian slip much? in other words, i've had mgmt's new album on my brain. it's so different from oracular spectacular that when i first heard it i was kind of like:

but then it started to grow on me. it's strange - i initially hated every song in my 100! playlist (in case it wasn't obvious, that's the smart playlist that houses my 100 top-played songs), while the songs i find most earwormy and hummable are among my least favorites. like this weekend - during our lovely friday off, i went to dsw to hang with jenibean and was exposed to her strange collection of car music for the second time. among them was a song whose lyrics seemed to be nothing but the phrase "she's a sexy chick" and three or four songs which sounded exactly like and whose subject matter dealed with "rumpy pumpy" as my lit teacher calls it. the only saving grace to any of them was that they had pretty awesome beats and bad mixing so you could never really tell what the singer was saying. in other words, they were all the perfect earworms. do you think i'm going to be sullying ophelia the ipod with any of those songs?

if you answered anything other than "no" to that question, i will refer you to the following gif. in this scenario, pretend that ophelia the ipod is jim and Crappy Music is dwight. now watch:

there, does that clear things up for you? i thought it'd help. the office can explain anything. so can family guy, actually.

wow, early release is almost over. i've got to go to buzzer club in, like, ten minutes, so i'm going to wrap this up. oh, and in case you didn't notice, i copied gina's idea and added a currently reading tab over on the right side of the page.

state of the union

i hear today's a holiday of some sort. i like to think of it as zombie jesus day but i've been informed that that name may offend some people. to which i say this:

Dear Some People,

Suck it. 

Love, 

Rachel

in order to commemorate this wonderful day of peep-giving and -receiving i thought i'd share a picture with you:

i realize it's been a while since i've blogged. i don't actually have an excuse for that since i've mostly spent this week in blissful seclusion - excluding one trip to visit jenibean - and it's been the best thing to ever happen to me.

i don't know if you noticed, but the last few times i blogged i'd been feeling pretty run down. or sick. or depressed and sick and partially on fire. whatever. the point is, i was not in a happy place. however, after a week of literally doing nothing besides snacking, reading, running, lying around in my backyard enjoying the pretty weather, snickering at jenibean's life, and listening to music in the sun like a hippie i feel amazing. like, skipping-through-fields-to-the-sound-of-music happy, even.  basically, i'm as happy as this Tiny Elephant:

now, as it's zombie jesus day easter sunday and Operation: Read Instead is officially over, i'm sure you're all wondering why i'm typing up this blog and not, like, avidly watching tv. my poor, abused, full-capacity DVR is also wondering this. suprisingly, though, i think Operation: Read Instead was a success. i still haven't watched any television today. instead i did some laundry, snacked (and snacked and snacked, oh my lord i love peeps), worked out, and read. i finished rereading a thousand splendid suns by khaled that-guy-who-wrote-the-kite-runner-whose-last-name-i-can't-spell-and-am-too-lazy-to-look-up and am now smack dab in the middle of yet another sherlock holmes. after that i've got a few more books lined up.

anyway, i've come to the conclusion that i thrive under pressure. well, i kind of already knew that. but i still thought that fact bore pointing out. i like challenges. most importantly, i like challenges with a finite ending. i'm not entirely sure what i'll take up as my next one, but i think it's going to be either doing the 30 day shred properly or something else fitness related. the only downside to both Operation: Read Instead and visiting The (Jeni)Bean is that both of them seem to make me ridiculously fat. seriously, between all of jeni's baking and my compulsive need to snack i've definitely gained weight. so look for eventual depressed updates on that the next time i go shopping.

here's a random observation: putting my iTunes on shuffle always makes me feel like i've stolen the music library of a manic-depressive schizophrenic. mostly because i've listened to punkbitch by 3OH!3, keep the car running by arcade fire, shut up i am dreaming of places where lovers have wings by sunset rubdown, and i just can't wait to be king from the lion king soundtrack since i started writing this post.

now, onto the news i'm sure you were all waiting for:

College. with a capital c, no less. anyway, here's the verdict:

1. american university - accepted
2. mary washington - accepted + $12,000 a year
3. william & mary - accepted
4. UVA - accepted
5. christopher newport - accepted + full tuition
6. NYU - is full of complete asshats. i've gotten emails and phone calls basically confirming acceptance. but where's my letter? a quick look at the website and call to the admissions office reveals that they're still in the process of mailing things. well, gee, great. thanks a lot. 

i kind of felt like this when i found out:

so there's where i stand right now. i know that i'm going to pass on UVA, CNU, and american for various reasons. actually, i'm 99% sure i'm going to pass on william & mary, too (sorry banana) since UMW is willing to give me money and it's pretty. at least for the first year. if i can save $12,000 as a freshman and then transfer, well...i mean, if they let me in once i'd have to, like, flunk out of college for them to reject me as a transfer applicant, right? 

anyway, there's been a lot of dancing and screeching and shopping going on in the house o' rachel as a result of april first. i mostly mention the screeching to reiterate my earlier point that the NYU admissions office is full of horrible people who need to quit taking vacations on the weekend and get around to mailing things already. but i'm calm. it's cool. also included in the general celebrations has been permission to download-at-will on iTunes, courtesy of the momster. so now i've got sherlock holmes, casino royale, both narnia movies, and a ton of music residing on compy. 

update of the shuffle craziness: we've gone from freak-a-leak by petey pablo to you and i by ingrid michaelson to folds in your hands by passion pit. i don't even know anymore. here, i'll give you some decent music to make up for it:

what? do you not count that as decent music? i'm shocked. shocked and appalle- oh, who am i kidding. i figured the tales of my iTunes shufflage would be enough. just watch the funny video while i go outside and soak up the last few hours of freedom sunlight before school tomorrow.

the diogenes club

"There are many men in London, you know, who, some from shyness, some from misanthropy, have no wish for the company of their fellows. Yet they are not averse to comfortable chairs and the latest periodicals. It is for the convenience of these that the Diogenes Club was started, and it now contains the most unsociable and unclubable men in town. No member is permitted to take the least notice of any other one. Save in the Stranger's Room, no talking is, under any circumstances, allowed, and three offences, if brought to the notice of the committee, render the talker liable to expulsion." 

- The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes: The Greek Interpreter

today's title is, surprisingly, not from a song. rather, it's from sherlock holmes and perfectly describes my idea of heaven right now. does anyone else want to join the lansdowne chapter of the diogenes club? i promise it's fun.

it's been a while since i've blogged (or, you know, actually been on the internet). i have a valid excuse, i promise! remember that seven school days i missed? yeah, i just made up all of my work, including two calc tests, in four days.

i am fully expecting congratulations and applause. i might not be able to hear that applause, but you better be clapping your hands at the computer screen anyway.

speaking of computer screens, i had a bad few minutes of it today when i finally looked at mine today. in the half an hour i had to wait for UVA to post its admission decision online i realized that i'd accidentally deleted my R2D2 icon for safari. it's okay, though, he's back. see?

 

hmm, maybe when i'm bored i'll just post a picture of one of the weird icons i've replaced my applications with. 

anyway, i've decided that i'm going to be a hermit this spring break. i'm tired and sick of people. so i think i'll just sit around and eat mint chocolate chip ice cream and read books for fun and enjoy having front teeth. you know, the important things in life. well, perhaps i'll occasionally venture forth from my den of iniquity lameness to spend time with people and shop and frolic in parks and take pictures and relearn how not to talk in run-on sentences and polysyndeton. perhaps. i make no guarantees, though. 

for example, i've promised jenibean that i'd come to her house bearing a duffel bag of junk food so we can music day and be silly together. also i need to escape the momster, who upon hearing of my various college acceptances alternates between states of happiness and my-only-pumpkin-is-leaving-me-what-are-we-going-to-do? and, yes, that last one really is a state of being. anyone who has met her will agree with me. she's very...emotive. however, upon reflection i've decided i will stay home and continue to hermit with my bag of goodies unless jenibean watches skins. 

who could resist a show that gives you scenes like this?

it really is the perfect show. also the soundtrack/the music editor's blog has introduced me to a lot of new music.

ah, music. you thought you'd get away from it, didn't you? well, too bad because i finally cracked the 13,000 song mark. currently i have this many songs: thirteen thousand and two. 

and, in no particular order, here are three of the thirteen thousand (and two) songs which i listened to today. 

to begin with, i'm listening to this right now. because death cab is timeless and appropriate hermit music:

i was listening to this earlier, since i was reading sherlock holmes and it seemed appropriate:

and, finally, a song which i blogged about a few posts ago:

show me your teeth

the title of today's post comes from lady gaga's teeth and is for once highly appropriate. mostly because i didn't actually have a full set of teeth this morning. worse - i was missing half (read it like this: half!) of one of my front teeth.

yes, morgan freeman, i agree. this doesn't make any sense.

i suppose i should splainy then (hey, if banana can make up words, so can i). as we all remember, i had very excited plans to return to school today. to that end, i woke up (early, for once, i even got meggo's seven-something-in-the-morning text but was too busy bleeding all over the bathroom to reply to it), brushed my teeth (oh, my teeth), and took a shower. to borrow from jenibean's third person blogging style, Shi(h)t(zu) Happened Like This:

7:20 - Rachel shampoos her hair. 

7:21 - Rachel stops shampooing hair and takes a moment to appreciate the oh-so-delectable scent of Herbal Essence's Hello, Hyrdation shampoo. (The reader should note that this shampoo is even more wonderful than its name and scent would suggest owing to the fact that it is not one, but two whole shades of purple)

7:22 - Rachel resumes shampooing. 

7:24 - Rachel gets dizzy. 

7:24 and a half - Rachel thinks "Gee, this isn't good, time to get out of the shower."

7:25 or 11,320-Why-Is-The-Clock-Spinning-Like-That - Rachel hops out of the shower.

7:26 - OMG OMG OMG I CAN'T BREATHE. 

7:27 - Ditto. 

7:27 - AGHHHHHH.

7:28 - Rachel nosedives. Onto the bathroom's exceedingly soft tile floor. Bottom half of front tooth decides to abandon ship. 

7:29 - The Momster, henceforth referred to in all communications as The Momster, begins a single-front offensive on an enemy known as Locked Bathroom Door. 

7:30 - The Momster, despite being approximately a foot tall and twenty two pounds (more or less), is as her name suggests, a formidable figure of fury. The Door surrenders. 

7:31 - Rachel catches sight of tooth. Uncontrollable crying ensues. The Momster calls in Emergency Dental Reserves. 

And then from eight in the morning until a little after noon there ensued a truly horrifying process known by the cheerful name of Tooth Reconstruction. it involved drills, and filing, and compulsive measuring of my teeth. however, throughout this process i was allowed the use of my iPod and was able to more or less ignore the fact that my dentist (who's adorable and asian and yet has a southern accent and is always pleasantly surprised that i can pronounce her last name - nguyen - because of meggo's tagalog newspeak tutelage) was, you know, filing my front teeth into an acceptable shape and size.

i have since been assured by the momster, her assistant, and the entire dentist's office don't judge me they were my front teeth and prom is in like a month a few tooth-experts that the change isn't noticeable. actually, the momster went so far as to say they look better now than before, since i had been (past tense! my poor lost teeth!) in the possession of rather overlarge front teeth and now they're more-or-less normal sized. but she's required to say that, since she's my tiny, scary, psychotic momster. actually, so are the rest of you. i'm not even kidding. if i see you in the next few weeks, there had better not be an honest comment from any of you or i will cry. and, trust me, you don't want to see my cry. it's a messy business, all snot and flapping hands and hiccups and shrieking and things. let's all avoid it, okay?

well, except you, s-la. i'm trusting you to give me your unmitigated opinion on The Tooth Situation. and if, after careful observation, you have concluded that i'm horribly disfigured i'm retiring to my bedroom forevermore and becoming a professional hermit i'm not going to prom.

on a happier note, i discovered that i'm fully capable of texting while having my teeth drilled. also, i used my dentist-time productively by googling facts about the healthcare bill. and then i used that freebooks app jeni was going on about a little while ago to read more sherlock holmes, since my copy was still at home. oh, and the momster has tried to comfort me over my state of probable-exam-takingness by pointing out that when one is a Student In Good Standing and will be handing over no less than eight (highly bloodstained, but that couldn't be helped, i had the great misfortune of landing on my face) notes to the attendance office tomorrow, there's got to be at least one teacher willing to let me off. right? don't shatter my dreams, kids.

oh, and after some prompting, i have concluded that the development of my (dearly departed) front teeth has kept pace with hermione granger - first they were too big and then they got horrifically filed shrunk. so at least i have that to comfort me.

also comforting? these three songs, they were my favorites during the Dentist Trip of Nightmares Future:

because i do have a ton of "bruises and contusions" between Sickville #1, the Great Pancake Incident, and The Holy Union of Floor and Face:

and a classic which now rings sadly true:

rhymes with ick

so my day was pretty awful. random muscle cramps and a fever last night lead to me being knocked out (who knew the dr. cray cray pills would come in handy after all?) until...five o'clock, actually. let me clarify  that: five p.m.

so i missed school today. surprisingly, that's a really, really bad thing. now i have to go in super early to make up that stupid calc test and i can only miss one more b day unless i want to take exams (i don't). life: it's depressing. luckily i had this to cheer me up:

oh, julian casablancas, don't ever change, okay? i'm not even kidding. just stay exactly the same forever and ever - dorian gray managed it, why can't you? oh, you don't want to enshrine your soul in a painting? well too bad.

that's the other thing i've been doing for the whole four hours i've been awake: rereading the picture of dorian gray. i really want to see the movie version with silly prince caspian ben barnes as dorian.

for those of you still undecided about watching skins (jeni), here's yet another reason why you should get over british televisions' unique definition of censorship and watch anyway:

this is from season two. chris is basically the best character on the show. besides cassie. and maxxie. and tony. and effy (oh my god, effy. her last episode just about killed me). besides the episode this is from is all about the school's attempt to put on a show...called Osama: The Musical. i know.

anyway, i'm still feeling pretty awful (and have to continue studying for calc since the makeups are usually a billion times worse than the regular tests) so i'm going to cut this post short. goodnight, moon all you cray crays.

i will never have children, or: two tales of bad parenting.

it's been a while since i blogged. sorry about that. these past few days have been eventful. s-la, meggo, jenibean, and i went to see alice friday night. it was awesome. johnny depp was predictably unfortunate looking but the CGI and alice's costuming fully made up for that. helena bonham carter kind of stole the show, but that's to be expected. and i just got home from a birthday party/sleepover at jodie's, so that explains last night's missing blog. i'm not going to elaborate on either of those events, so if you really want details you should badger s-la to blog about them.

because you (all eight of you) are such conscientious followers of my blog, i'm sure you're wondering what prevented me from blogging thursday night or saturday afternoon. surely i was spending all my leisure time cackling away about your rachel-blog-deprivation.

well, if you thought that, you'd be wrong. i now present to you two tales of epic mommery. be warned, they aren't for the faint of heart.

let's begin with thursday, shall we?

on thursday i received a text from the momster asking me to go with her to her office and do real estate things for her since her assistant was out. i, being the wonderful person that i am, agreed. however, instead of going directly to her office her client texted and said she wanted to meet us at a bar. okay, we said. so we went to the bar. and then the momster realized she needed to pick up extra pens and things since, you know, they aren't really supplied in bars and restaurants, so she left me to order some snacks and headed to staples - where her client called, changed her mind, remembered that she had to be at some play for her kid in an hour, and asked the momster to meet at the office after all. crunched for time, the momster left staples and went to the office - leaving me, a platter of the best wings i've ever had, and my annotated copy of the poisonwood bible alone in a bar. alone.

it was traumatic. did you know that people hit on you at bars? even when you're munching on wings and reading your book and clearly projecting the 'i'm underage, go away' vibe. some of those people were old! like mid-twenties old. and buying drinks. and not even the happy, fizzy coca cola-type of drinks. it was horrible.

i'm thinking i shouldn't have yelled at the momster about it, though, since now she's on this 'my one and only child is going to college' bonding kick. we spent all of yesterday shopping. my feet and arms felt like they were going to fall off by the end of it. and then we left the mall too late to come home and still make it to jodie's on time, so i had to buy a new toothbrush and set of pajama bottoms and sleeping bag. that sleeping bag is the silliest thing, it's huge. at least it doesn't resemble my old sleeping bag - that one's shaped like a coffin and 'contours to the body' according to the north face sales people.

anyway, the bonding lead to me basically getting an entire spring wardrobe. here, check out the bounty:

in case you couldn't tell, the rainbow bra was my favorite purchase. getting it was awful, though - it involved seeing a librarian in victoria's secret. buying things. i can't bring myself to elaborate any further.  

we ended up getting manicures, too. the woman who did mine was pretty cray cray - all she did was grunt and move my hand and watch the chinese drama on the television behind me. she did an awesome job, though, so now my nails look like this:

i don't have a weird number-shaped birthmark on my hand, either - i wrote someone's locker combination on my hand in fine-tipped sharpie and now it won't wash off. i scrubbed and scrubbed with the little heated towels and in the shower yesterday and it just wouldn't go. i guess i'll just have to wait for it to fade. 

and just to round out this little trio of grainy iphone photos, here's lulu. i think she looks like a squirrel in this picture, what do you think?

i tried to get cookie to pose, since he's the nice dog, but he doesn't like cameras. oh well.

i'm listening to four winds by bright eyes, mostly because s-la said she didn't like it. clearly s-la is a deranged cat-lover with catastrophic brain damage since all sane people like the song.

slow night, so long

today's title is from kings of leon. it's one of the good songs from before they sold out and became all pearl jammy. is it sad that i preferred them as musicians when they were drunk, drugged up, and whoring themselves out around england? because i totally do - their music was just so much better then.

it has been a slow night (and day) though. i've mostly been doing homework and last-minute scholarship applications, with occasional breaks for snacking or running or heading down to the grocery store to buy more ice pops. i know, i know - my life. it's terribly exciting, right?

so i guess this post is going to be more of a link/picture/music post than anything else (since i'm doubting any of you wants to hear the story of the little old lady in line behind me at harris teeter and her conviction that the 'teevee', pronounced with extreme emphasis on the 'e' sound, lectured the cashier about the importance of triple-ply toilet paper).

to begin with, while googling around for reviews of the last and latest johnny cash album, i came across this and it made me smile. he was pretty awesome, right? which, naturally, leads into the beginning of my homework playlist: god's gonna cut you down.

i studied for calc a little, drafted my poisonwood essay, and then took a break to watch the unseen skins vignettes online and catch up on reading the music director's blog, now that i've watched all the way through the fourth season. among other things, i realized that eyes as candles by passion pit and dog days are over by florence and the machine were both used in one of my favorite episodes. in other words, they became songs two and three on today's playlist.

after skins, i finished studying for calc and started doing more scholarship applications. that got tedious fast, though, so eventually i wandered back to tumblr and found a pretty amazing this, which is stark sands' cover of outkast's hey ya. i thought it was so amazing that i wasted a good half hour of my day finding a download link for it - which, let me tell you, was not easy since it's not even available on itunes.

insert a break for ice pop shopping, showering, and dancing around the house to she's lost control by joy division and skream's 0800 dub. and, i'll admit that those songs don't really go together except for how much i love them both. that and you can't really listen to either of them without wanting to move.

then came a few hours of uninterrupted work, after which i rewarded myself for my wonderful display of concentration by looking at funny pictures:

then came dinner, catching up on my emails, and blog-reading (speaking of which, hannah got a blog, go follow her). i still haven't turned my phone back on, though. strangely enough, i've been enjoying the silence. 

so that was my day, as told by ginger through pictures, music, and occasional capital letter-free text. here's hoping tomorrow will be more interesting. and by 'more interesting' i mean 'interesting in a good way and not in an i-failed-calculus-and-forgot-my-lit-homework-on-the-kitchen-table way'.