dear all,

it appears that my gentle hint from the last post was missing a few key components. so here:


R-wa
UNIVERSITY OF MARY WASHINGTON 1536
1701 COLLEGE AVENUE
FREDERICKSBURG, VA. 22401-4661

well, maybe that address should include my actual name. this is the interwebz, though, and you should all know who i am.

p.s. someone make mona start blogging.

let's see how far we've come

today's title comes from how far we've come by matchbox twenty. i've got this playlist full of really cheesy songs that i listen to during moves/transferring schools/important life changes &c. and this one is all over it.

in case that wasn't enough to tip you off, i'm in full on nostalgia mode right now. i'm not entirely sure why it kicked in now and not, like, a week/month/year ago, but...well, it probably has something to do with this:

that? that is the result of six hours of shopping yesterday. my feet still haven't recovered. and i strained my ankle doing yoga last night and have to wear tape on it like a loser, so that might have something to do with it.


i've got to pick up a bunch of odds and ends tomorrow morning before the movie marathon s-la mentioned finally starts, but other than that i'm...done. other than laundry and physically throwing things into boxes (i'm not a big believer in that thing called "neatness", especially not when it comes to packing), i'm actually ready to move into my dorm...and away from home. i feel like i should be more excited/worried/spastic about this. i'm mostly just calm, though. maybe this is the real reason seniors get to leave school early - summer has stretched on for so long that i'm just ready to actually do something. or at least get away from the momster who keeps trying to bribe me to stay home with cupcakes and coffee and crying binges in the middle of the container store, oh lord.

it's so weird to think about this, but - excepting meggo, of course - i didn't know any of you four years ago, and now you're all so important. i wonder who we're all going to meet in the next four years. i wonder if we'll still talk then, or if we'll all have gone the way of the girl jenibean affectionately refers to as she-devil. like s-la, i don't think we will. for one thing, we really are the only people weird enough to put up with each other, and for another, i'm kind of bossy. all of you better expect lots of annoying blog posts/texts/facebook messages from me for the rest of your lives. also, we've discovered technology! see?

look at us, using technology. successfully, even. i'm still a little amazed. honestly, web cams just make me feel old. it seems like not that long ago video chatting was that thing they showed in movies to let you know you were in The Future. what happened to us?

also, i feel like our omegle adventures really have scarred me for life. like, i might have post traumatic stress disorders. when we added bean to the conversation her friend was the only person in view and i had, like, a vietnam flashback, all "OMG PENISES. PENISES ARE GOING TO RISE OUT OF THE DEPTHS AND FLASH US RUN FOR YOUR LIVES BITCHES."

and, yes, that is exactly how the vietnam war was fought. don't let anyone tell you anything different, okay?

maybe later i'll take a picture of the dogs for you all. the momster had them shaved again. they look terrifying.

singing songs and carrying signs

today's title comes from for what it's worth by buffalo springfield. i've been going through this whole hippie/hermit phase lately. no, i don't understand it either.

anyway, since everyone else seems to be doing it, i thought i'd jump on the bandwagon and do a link roundup. so, here's all the things on the internet that've caught my eye lately.

this commercial, because it's awesome:

and to continue the football soccer trend, here's something cute:

apparently a kitten wandered onto the field and had to be carried off in the middle of a game. now let me hear you all say it: awww.

and here's something i've held off on posting for a long time, considering the reaction i got last time i posted anything bieber-related. rest assured, guys - it's good. 600-something people on tumblr agree. so listen to all of them and give this cover a chance:

now, onto the serious things:

from an actual tea party event. apparently there are now tea party crashers.

...or not.

this lovely public service announcement came from this article full of hilarious examples of religious propaganda gone wrong.

and-- oh, i give up. my life revolves around the world cup and will for the next month. here's what i've really been doing on the internet lately:

it's okay, stu. we still think you're pretty. 

ivory coast player didier drogba wins the cutest kid award:

and germany ties with us for the most ridiculous ref award:

but win for their reaction:

here ends your world cup roundup. have a nice day, kids.

one definition of senioritis

"In endowing us with memory, nature has revealed to us a truth utterly unimaginable to the unreflective creation, the truth of immortality. The most ideal human passion is love, which is also the most absolute and animal and one of the most ephemeral."

- george santayana

if you ever wonder about the things i love, the things i look at, the things that catch my eye and imagination in the spare half-hours i spend between homework and nighttime, when the sky is still dark and has yet to shade into sunrise and morning - check the tumblr.

someone in buzzer club brought up a really strange point today. he said something along the lines of "while i was playing with legos, you people were all reading old books and watching TCM".

i don't even really know the person who said that, except in that hazy, wavy, "friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend" way. what he said stuck with me anyway.

who dictates what's normal? who has the right to wake up one morning and dictate what we should and should not like or be interested in or think is pretty flipping cool?

we all probably know the answer to those questions - mtv. and, wow, they've done a wonderful job of educating america's youth, haven't they? most people my age can't tell the difference between trotsky and tolstoy, use the words good and well interchangeably, and think that hallelujah is that one song they played on the o.c. and american idol a few times.

in other words: this post? it's basically a summation of all the reasons i hate people.

you know, whenever i say that out loud i never fail to receive at least one startled look from someone. and i understand that, i do, because when i say 'i hate people' i'm hyperbolizing. obviously.

but there are days, like today, where i can't help but wonder what's wrong with the rest of the world. what's wrong with the people spending an entire hour and a half in yearbook looking up prom dresses or the people who never read the (legitimately wonderful) books in english class or...everyone, really. where are the readers? the thinkers? the dreamers?

like the lady of shalott i'm half sick of shadows today. luckily, i have a stack of books waiting for me to return once i've finished this (grammatically incorrect, i'm sure, but this is the internet) post.

i think i'll just curl up with my brownies and my books and my brand new ipod and count down the days until graduation, because i'm tired of waiting for people to develop functioning brains.

before i go, though, i'll leave you with this poem. it's one of my favorites, so i might have blogged about it before. i know steffi, at least, has already seen this since one of the prerequisites of friendship with me is that you both read and like edna st. vincent millay. in other words, if you're reading this and you consider us friends, you better love this poem. or else.

Dirge Without Music

I am not resigned to the shutting away of loving hearts in the hard ground.
So it is, and so it will be, for so it has been, time out of mind:
Into the darkness they go, the wise and the lovely. Crowned
With lilies and with laurel they go; but I am not resigned. 

Lovers and thinkers, into the earth with you.
Be one with the dull, the indiscriminate dust.
A fragment of what you felt, of what you knew,
A formula, a phrase remains, --- but the best is lost. 

The answers quick & keen, the honest look, the laughter, the love,
They are gone. They have gone to feed the roses. Elegant and curled
Is the blossom. Fragrant is the blossom. I know. But I do not approve.
More precious was the light in your eyes than all the roses in the world. 

Down, down, down into the darkness of the grave
Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind;
Quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave.
I know. But I do not approve. And I am not resigned.

it's called "dirge without music" and so this post will also be musicless. and yes, i am perfectly aware that musicless wasn't actually a word, but if shakespeare could conjure up words out of thin air and have them approved by the oxford english dictionary, i can create one measly portmanteau. bon soir mes amis.

desktops!

remember how i promised you a nice long blog post about yesterday? and i said i wouldn't keep posting pictures and music and random things?

well, i lied. i'm sure you're all surprised. i was kind of busy today, but most of my adventures can't be written up here (you'll probably hear about them anyway). there is one thing i can share, though - the momster's shiny computers inspired me to change my desktop and icons!

...yes, i really am lame enough to be excited about that. don't judge me. or do. it's only the internet.

here, take a look:

i'm particularly fond of the darth vader and r2d2 icons (preview and safari, respectively). i loaded in a bunch of goodies today. i'm still kind of sad that the lord of the rings icon set was only for windows users. my life just doesn't feel complete without having mordor/mount doom as my trashcan.

you know what else my life isn't complete without? television. i miss it so much. the only good thing that's come of all this is that i've been reading way more than before. hopefully i've been reading better, too. remember being a kid and reading things just for the 'story'? like, you thought the plot sounded cool (not that you even knew what plot meant) so you'd read the story mostly so you could pretend that you were in it. (well, maybe i was the only kid who did this, i don't know)

i had a really funny conversation with someone about not understanding people who don't reread books. the conversation in question was made even better by the girl standing behind us in line at the bookstore interrupting to tell us that she 'never rereads books, i don't see the point, it's not like the words, like, change, or something'. someone was obviously in academic english. doesn't it seem like books change every time you read them? even the so-called 'easy reads'. i've never reread a book without learning or noticing something new. and so i bring you, in more or less accurate order, my rereads of the week:

1.  the poisonwood bible. this shouldn't be a surprise to anyone, since we're still working with it in english and i have a giant project on it due in two weeks. 
2. jane eyre. i finally finished it (again!). i tried to draw it out as long as possible.
3. wide sargasso sea. which i prefer to pretend is unrelated to jane (and darling mr. rochester). 
4. moby dick. call me ishmael, kids. 

that's all for today. if you're really interested in what i'm listening to, scroll back up and take a closer look at that desktop image. or scroll down and look at yesterday's picture.

on the way to cassadaga to commune with the dead

today's title was, once again, stolen from bright eyes' song four winds. in case you couldn't tell, i really like it. go listen to it or i will cut you.

oh, and in case you were wondering, one communes with the dead via pictures. be warned, there will be a lot of them in today's post. i wish i could create a nifty little sign to warn you properly. it'd be all fancy and yellow and have lots of stick figures spelling out 'hit the back button' a la YMCA. after seeing this picture, though, i'm afraid that no sign i create will ever measure up:

i really have nothing to blog about. no thing. all i've done is put the emergency groceries away - doesn't it seem like everyone and their mother went grocery shopping today? - and watch my snow fort melt slowly in the sun. thankfully nature is going to rebuild it for me since, you guessed it, we're in for more snow tomorrow. to which i say:

in case you were wondering, a good portion of this post will be pictures or links. this is mostly because, as a result of the snow week, i've spent an unhealthy amount of time on the internet. pity me. 

as a result of my boredom i even offered to drive myself somewhere. me. driving. voluntarily. 

in case you were wondering why this is such a novel event, my native american name is actually Fears Car Gets Crushed. 

and, of course, after bravely attempting to overcome my fear of the car, the momster's reaction went like this:

and then my face, it did this:

and then for the rest of the day i was about .00092 seconds away from becoming this person:

okay, that's all folks. i'm off to watch david letterman and curse all of jay leno's ancestors and descendants for removing coco from my television. 

reasons why rachel has yet to sleep

1. the interwebs:

(climbing up the walls - radiohead)

2. coffee. and links about coffee. 

(you wanna get me high - the donnas)

3. them things with the words and the - what's it called? oh yeah, paper. 

(bell, book, & candle - eddi reader)

winter is nature's way of saying "up yours"

today's title was taken from a quote by robert byrne. i totally agree with it and, in protest of the untimely snowfall which postponed my american university interview and ruined all my hopes and dreams of getting to a bookstore soon, i've spent most of today imagining that it's summer.

s-la's already posted about our fun-filled friday, so i'll spare you a repeat of all the details. she's not the only one who's been writing, either, but we all know how i feel about sharing what i write with The World. even if The World currently consists of a six people and a few lurkers.

i spent most of today reading and writing and running (and cleaning up my poor, abused itunes library), though, so to salvage this post i'll share a meme that's been floating around the interwebs:

Put your iTunes on shuffle and post the first lines of the first 20 songs that play in a poem. Make the first line of the 21st song the poem's title. 

"where it began, i can't begin to know when"

i was running late for work

i think it's time that i mention

there is no greater love

i like my music loud

the ice is thin come on dive in

are you going to take me home tonight?

in the dream you were

in a car in the driveway the conversation's colors paint themselves on canvas

no mercy for what we're doing

mon amour mi corazon

classic makes perfect in person

the trophy that i made for us

as far as i can see

tough break handjob broke it all in two

the samples won't delay but the cable

please don't go crazy if i tell you the truth

you spin my head right round, right round

once i had a love and it was a gas

free - that's all that she could bleed 

i will keep the bad things from you

wow, the person i snagged that meme from was right - it does turn into a really cracked out poem. i'm okay with that though - mostly because i'm feeling silly today and the internet is facilitating my immaturity. then again, unlike some people i'm still a youthful seventeen and can't possibly aspire to the dignity and solemnity required by adulthood. also that same person should know that the kingdom hearts version of this is halloween just came on and it's amazing. i think i'm going to get back on the treadmill now or maybe sniff around the kitchen for the leftovers from tonight's dinner - thai food, yum. 

oh, fine, i'll blog something real

mostly because i'm so annoyed with this site for existing. annoyed enough that i'm going to get up on my soapbox and rant because the fact that even the name of the website is perpetuating this awful thin ideal makes me so angry i don't even know what to do besides go off in my own quiet corner of the internet. because, honestly, the fact that "curvy" is portrayed so negatively (to say nothing of how repugnant the site's concept is to begin with - judging famous women based solely on their weight without caring about why they're famous - like, say, having actual talent and not just the lowest number on the scale) is offensive to me. and yeah, i know - "free speech means everyone can do/say/post whatever they want". which, obviously, i'm all for that (geez, can you imagine if censoring was real, all 1984-you-can't-have-a-diary? my poorly capitalized blogging days would be o-v-e-r), but how do you justify creating or maintaining that website? what possible purpose or satisfaction can you get from spending your time judging other people?

well, okay, i just spent an entire paragraph judging other people, but at least there was a purpose to it, mainly that i think they are doing something wrong and would like to do something to call attention to it just to ease my own conscience.

okay, you can all stop doing the duck-and-cover now. i'm done ranting. here, have one of my favorite songs to make up for it: