one night to be confused

today's title comes from heartbeats by the knife, as covered by jose gonzalez. it's pretty.

i've had a fairly busy two days. yesterday, as i might have mentioned (i don't know if i did or not, and i'm too lazy to go back and check), i did yoga for the first time since AP exams began. it was great at the time, but i've been feeling the effects all day. here's a helpful warning for all of you: lunges, squats, running, and leg- and thigh-targeting yoga tapes do not make for a very comfortable monday morning. i was so sore today and most of the soreness was centered in my legs so i spent the whole day convinced that i was walking strangely. paranoia: it's the new black.

this whole day was pretty weird, actually.

you totally thought this would be a gif. to which i say: suck it, predictability.

yeah, that picture basically sums up all my feelings regarding school, life, and the world in general.

my day kicked off at the wonderful hour of 2 a.m. because i had a killer migraine. still retaining hopes of getting a decent amount of sleep, i went downstairs and hit up the advil bottle, figuring that would get rid of all my headache-related troubles. and then i went back to bed and waited for my migraine to go away...for two hours. at 4:30 i finally gave up and went downstairs and took three of the closest aspirin-looking bottle i could find (i wasn't wearing my glasses), figuring that the pills looked like tylenol. and they were - tylenol p.m. needless to say i finally got back to sleep...and woke up at 8 a.m. to find the momster banging on my door. i took one of the fastest showers of my life, threw on an outfit comprised entirely of clothes i haven't worn since eighth grade or freshman year, and went to school.

i probably would have fallen right back asleep in the car if it weren't for an emergency trip to starbucks. i lucked out there. they were training a new employee and it was still raining so there was no line, and the new employee messed up my drink order the first time she tried to make it so i got a free venti sized drink instead. i also had two backup tumblers of coffee to tide me over until lunch. luckily school wasn't so bad. my a day teachers, at least, have had the decency to give up on the possibility of any of us learning anything within the lovely cinderblock walls of a high school ever again. so we're doing a completely useless project in econ (jennifer and i are already almost done), sitting around and chatting in yearbook, and watching movies and drawing pictures about our Feelings in gov (you don't know how much i wished i was british during that class so i could sit up and announce, "i'm english - we don't have feelings" and maybe thrown in a "pip pip" or a "cheerio" or something similar. i don't know, in my mind people in england are still stuck in the empire builder stage).

robert downey jr. has no purpose in this post. robert downey jr. needs no purpose.

and then came early release, where i chatted with mona while i waited for the momster to come collect me (no, i will not be driving regularly enough to take myself to school, thank you very much. i'm not that crazy). we had a good talk, involving makeup, music, and blogging. apparently she's a lurker. also, she might be joining our Nameless Band of Munchkins Except For Jenibean Who Throws the Entire Thing Off By Being a Tall Asian So I Guess We're Musketeers for our sleepover this friday. since we don't want a repeat of how s-la was introduced to the other Musketeers (it was awkward), i suggest she start commenting so that the Musketeers can get to know her. also, everyone keep in mind that our merry band of almost-munchkins is welcome to suggestions for a better name.

then came the two hour conference call of slightly dead-eyed randomness (methinks i wasn't the only one feeling a little out of it today) where we attempted to hash out our weekend plans. conclusions reached: we can't make plans. it was enlightening. at least i rediscovered a kesha song and found my 997th cover song. now to find those last three. i'm hoping they're good ones. quality control is important, you know?

and then i started blogging. oh, and catching up on my usual internet binge of current events/music news/blog reading. here's a new one i found. it's equal parts funny and sad, so be warned.

and here are the songs i've been listening to today. none of them are new or unique or anything. they've just been on loop in my head.

today's title song:

another pretty song. i first heard it on grey's anatomy years (has it really been years since that show was decent enough to watch? that's so weird) ago in the second season episode damage case. if you haven't watched the first two seasons of that show, you should, since they were actually really good...and then it got famous and the writing became awful:

oh, and this one's been on my summer sleep playlist for a while, but i thought now would be a good time to post it since i have a banana-related message anyway and i'm too lazy to get on facebook (which i hate). dear banana: s-la wants you to come on a b day like tuesday or thursday or next monday or wednesday. then you can join the early release movie club and visit the weeds in the senior courtyard with us. i half agree with this plan, but would also like to point out that i am both incapable of giving advice and am in actual classes for three fourths of every b day, whereas you could probably sneak into econ (i have williams) and yearbook on a days. but then you could visit sturtz on b days when i have her and...i have no idea. i'm highly indecisive. show up some day so we can marvel over how much you once grew and how worldly wise you are &c. &c.

i went out into the night

my new doctor is trying to turn me into a druggie. at least, i think she is. like, she's the fill-in for my normal (also bitchy) doctor whose on vacation, and she seems convinced i need like 9835798573 pills. no, seriously. she's all 'why don't you sleep more? you need more sleep. here's a prescription for ambien.' and 'why are you so stressed out? there's no need to be stressed, everyone gets into college. have a prescription for xanax.' and then 'oh, no need to worry about those pesky side effects like drowsiness. every morning take one of these handy dandy uppers to get you alert for school. oh, and here's a prescription for valium. it's a muscle relaxant because you look tense.'

...you only wish i was kidding.

i've always wondered how, on tv shows or talk shows or movies, there'll be all of these housewives and, like, twelve year olds on maury talking about how they got addicted to prescription drugs or sell black market medication because they couldn't face the prospect of stripping for another ten years to pay for their kid's college tuition (that's a true story too - it was on the talk show that was playing in the waiting room) and now i know. like, apparently, there are doctors who'll just give you pills for anything. wow, world, no wonder our healthcare system is failing.

i was totally all for trying to find one of those desperate housewives or twelve year old addicts, but the momster told me i'm not allowed to take any of them (or even look at them too hard). oh well. there goes my future as a drug dealer. i guess i'll have to stay in school after all.

well, starting thursday, anyway. since the doctor was a nut, the momster made an appointment at another office for tomorrow, and then we might be going to williamsburg for a mental health/gee-i'm-bored-let's-drive day after. we'll see how that works out.

in other news, i'm listening to arcade fire again right now. neighborhood #3 (power out). it's my favorite.

oh, and i got new nail polish today. it's called ho ho ho red, which, wow. talk about bad nail polish names. it's a really pretty, christmassy color, tho, so i'm happy with it anyway. i don't think it's really fair to blame the nail polish for its name. after all, we don't do that to people, right? or i hope we don't, because poor apple martin and bronx wentz are going to have miserable lives in a few years, then.

also, everyone join in the push for jeni to either open a bakery or save me some goodies. all her pictures/texts/descriptions make me hungry, which is bad enough on its own when i've already gained weight (blegh, doctors - why must you weigh us every single time? what good does knowing that do anyone? none, that's what), but downright cruel when the only goodies in our house are an absolutely disgusting yule log and peanut butter chewy bars. seriously, jeni, if you keep this up santa's gonna bean you in the head with a lump of coal come christmas.

the third season of the tudors has finally finished downloading on itunes, so i'm going to go watch that now. night, guys.